I joined Michelle at the Y for a Kundalini Yoga class and a trip to the sauna today. Sweating is something I usually avoid, but I knew it was my next step. We sat in silence; our breath was the only sound playing back and forth between us and another woman sitting on the top shelf. After about fifteen minutes, I rubbed myself down with the towel and turned to leave. The nameless woman struggled to lower herself and refused my assistance and so I quietly left. The door to the sauna opened less than one minute later, and I heard Michelle calmly asking for me by name. I was able to squeeze around the opened door, as I realized this was more of a plea for help.
The floor of the sauna was tiled, wet, and slippery and I could see that Michelle was physically holding this woman up. After making my way around the door, I laid towels down to provide traction for our feet and I helped take some of the weight off of Michelle. This woman (I still don’t know her name) was not able to get her feet under herself and so we slowly lowered her to the ground. She was chanting, “I just overdid it. I just over did it.” She thought she would be alright; she wasn’t convincing me.
This overheated woman wanted to get on her way; it was obvious to me she wasn’t ready as she still couldn’t hold up her own weight, even her toes were turned under. She became irritated with me when I told her we were making a decision for her and she was going to sit down. No, she was going to take a shower.
You might be thinking, “What does this all have to do with living your purpose?”
As I showered, dressed, and made my own way to the car it became clear to me. Indulge me in my analogy as I ponder why had I become so irritated myself.
Not everyone wants my help, even when it’s extremely clear that I would be a really good tool for them at this point in their life. I use the word ‘tool’ purposefully, because when you decide you want to manifest something, then the support shows up. My purpose is to empower and to see my role as a coach as anything other than a tool people use to get what they want would be disempowering. It may be clear to me that someone needs help, but in the context of manifesting purpose, you have to ask for it. Then I can commit to being one of your most powerful tools in manifesting the life of your dreams. A day at the Y and I have greater clarity: I get phone calls from people who have decided that the only thing that will rid them of the pain of not living a life of purpose is to commit to manifesting their purpose.
You’re SUPPOSED to know it already. Suana Lady thought she had all the answers, even as she was slipping out from under herself like a newborn foal. She was embarrassed. Michelle of course understood, but I totally didn’t get the embarrassment thing. Compassion? Yes. Embarrassment? no. I mean we were all naked. Sauna Lady knew she needed to get some cold water (on her and in her) and she knew she needed to get herself up and on her way. Do you do this? Do you get moving without the support you need? Do you plead for the support and then turn the help away? Do you asked God to show you your purpose and then when the tools that would most support you show up, do you say something like, “Thanks, but no thanks.”
If you haven’t manifested your purpose into the world as powerfully and consciously as you would like to, are you willing to get the help you need? Where do you say, “No” when you should be saying, “Yes.” Are you willing to stand naked in your lack of knowing and be vulnerable so you can live the life you want to? Set aside your pride. Stop your self-sabotaging behaviors and wake the *$(#* up. This is your life and how much longer do you want to live below your potential? How much longer do you want to settle for less than ecstasy? Guess what? Maybe you need help.
I am willing to say these things because I care about you!
Don’t get help from us. Go talk to Tim Kelley, at know your purpose; he’ll help you! Go find your purpose in 20 minutes with Steve Pavlina. (I can’t get on his site, because it’s only for smart people. I bet you can sign up.) Start your own support group. Hire a coach. Keep looking until you find the support that you need. Why would I send you away from working with me? I’m not. Work with me. Work with Michelle. But if it’s not a match, don’t give up! It is imperative that you manifest your life’s purpose.
I know something that you might not know
You may already sense that you have something special inside of you. Well, I know you do. You may feel that you have a gift to share; that desire that’s inside of you…the one that you feel is so selfish to have–your purpose can be found in that deep longing in your heart. The desire that you have to swim with the dolphins or heal the birth experience or speak in front of a thousand people are all desires that will transform the planet when manifested. You need to stop making excuses. You need to make a commitment to yourself. And then you need to open your eyes (and heart) to the support that surrounds you and start saying, “Yes!”
I learned all this on a sauna room floor.
- Accept the help that awaits you from the many sources, the endless universe supports the manifestation of your purpose.
- Conscious awareness enables your ability to say, “Yes.”
- Gratitude needs to be the first thought when help shows up.
I am grateful for all the support I receive in manifesting my purpose.
Everything in my life, past and present, supports me in living my purpose. All the joy and sadness throughout my life supports me in living my purpose. All the triumphs and failures, all my experience with faith and fear, and all the confidence and self-doubt I’ve lived with supports my purpose. All the people in my life; my family, friends, children, teachers, and partners have helped me unveil my life purpose; they’ve helped me see myself and develop my gifts and talents through a lifetime. Even the dear homeless people I’ve coached sitting on park benches have allowed me to access my deepest expression of living my purpose.
Everything supports me in manifesting my purpose. Everything I read, everyone I talk to, every interaction I have supports me to this end. Even the woman who overdid it today in a Colorado Springs sauna room. I am so grateful to know how truly supported I am. I feel empowered and inspired and grateful for a naked woman begging that Michelle and I not drop her.
Written by CK Reyes - Life Coach, Facilitator and Cheerleader of your Wildest Dreams! Contact Leila using the tab above.
Divine Purpose Unleashed, Live Your Life Purpose is a division of Divine Purpose Unleashed, LLC. co founded by Michelle Vandepas and CK Reyes. Divine Purpose Unleashed works with Professionals, Therapists Coaches and other service professionals to Unveil their Divine Life Purpose, Unleash their Contribution to the world and Manifest their Conscious Livelihood®. No matter where you are in your journey, the DPU staff of coaches and professionals will guide you to live your purpose with clarity and align your your authentic expression with your marketing efforts. For more information about how you can work with us, please click on the 
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What a powerful summary of a lesson– all from a sauna! This has me thinking this morning that I’m not using my knowledge and gifts to the best of my ability– will be exploring that more today. I often do not reach out well to others when I need it the most.
Karen, please share what you learn in the next few days or weeks. Are you aware of where you need help now? What are the ‘automatic’ responses that come with your awareness of needing help? Do you come up against any of these common obstacles: feeling I am a burden to others, so better not ask for help, expecting that I should be able to do this and so I’d better suck it up and deal with it, feeling embarrassed that I got myself in this mess and so I’ll go hide my head in the sand until it goes away, or not feeling you are worthy of the support that is there?
I have a belief: The entire universe supports my success. With this belief in my conscious awareness, I can see the support around me and I can say, “Thank You,” with deep gratitude that I am so supported. This awareness helps me to say yes to the help that comes my way and to remember not to push away that for which I have asked. I am then open for help to show up in ways I would never have expected.
I am interested in your process with this and how your life shifts as a result.
You really hit a “hot button” with me on this article, CK.
It is really hard for me to ask for help. Somebody someway convinced me I cauld handle anything. (Except what Michelle knows)
My brother is fond of saying, “We never worry about you, Corinne!”
Damn it! How long will it take me to get over this?
How do you do it?
Like Corinne, I too have a hard time accepting help…
And am not sure how to move beyond this. I think I see accepting help as a sign of weakness… and I don’t want to appear as weak…
Lance,
There are two aspects of this that I want to highlight:
1. Ego: We are so arrogant aren’t we? We think that we have to do it all… We think we can do it all and that there is something wrong with us when we can’t. We set goals that we could never reach without help and as a result set ourselves up for failure, because we don’t want to ask for help.
Who do we think we are? We say to the universe, “Give me this…” and then when the ‘help’ shows us all around us, we sit around saying, “No, I can do it myself.” Who were we asking? I imagine it was a higher source. We ask from a higher source and when help shows up in the way of people, we suddenly feel weak…we have to let other people see us… instead of basking in the gratitude that we get what we want.
I’ve been there. But, today I can see how silly I’ve been. The only way God can help me do everything I want to do is to send me the people that have the pieces I don’t have….
I will exclaim right here: I DON’T KNOW IT ALL. I need help!
2. Weak. This is the shadow. When I don’t want anyone to see how weak I am or don’t let my weakness be seen, then I might act stronger than I am or say yes to things that I know I can’t do on our own…
Does any of this sound familiar?
Let me exclaim right here: I AM WEAK!
ps: somehow I feel stronger admitting that. How do you feel about me since I’ve told you I am weak?
Dear Ck -
I guess “willingness” is the first step.
No, I do not know it all – can do it all.
I am getting that the next step is surrender. Followed by acceptance.
Surrender is prcecede by numbness. Agitation leads to this.
When you realize that you are not in control, it seems to be the beginning.
So -????????????
No matter where you are, you can evolve to sense a clearer purpose. I like the sauna analogy. Many people might assume it would be an unlikely place to trigger revelations. The place is never matters. Your mindset, intent and resolve does.
I echo Corinne’s sentiment that for some of us, it’s hard to ask for help. I think overcoming that fear is courageous and a step in the right direction.
I found it fascinating how you used your experience in a hot sauna as an analogy to finding your life’s purpose by being willing to get help if and when you need it. Brilliant!
Corinne, what is one thing you need help with right now? Pick something small and ask someone who you know will not say no to you. Then pay attention to how you feel and what thoughts come up for you… This will help identify the automatic behavior, if there is any.
Liara, have you had any experience like this? A revelation in an unlikely place? How does your mindset make a difference. I want specifics! I live for the connection from sharing the details! or I’m just nosy.
Stephen, the analogy actually was formulating in my mind as I was standing naked on the floor with her and she snapped at me, glared at me, and with cold eyes said, “I can take care of myself.” I think we can take care of ourselves, but we have to pay attention. Her taking care of herself failed earlier when she made a choice to stay in the sauna longer than what her body could handle. Stretching out of our comfort zone is great, but when we have gone too far we need to humble ourselves or we will be humbled.
I am weak!!! Yeah, I said it! I do find most of my life I’ve been ALONE-chosen to I guess..My conditioning was not to trust others, they’ll just let you down.. This mindset has caused exactly that outcome time and time again! So, I had accepted it as truth..Glad to say this year I feel myself “coming out”-allowing others into my intimate circle. I felt the need to do this..No ones meant to go it alone! In fact, I have put myself out in the publics eye to inspire others to not feel the need to go it alone. I truly want for others what I want for myself…To identify and break free of all that limits us so we can truly live abundantly(freely). So many wounds and fearbased programs to overcome! But it’s happening!!!
Continue to ask and seek my friends! Like Michelle and CK have stated, when the opportunities come say YES!!!
Best wishes to all! Michelle and CK thanks for all you do! Gary
Yeah, Gary I LOVE weakness. I think the strength shines through when we admit we are weak. I love how you have been showing up in the community and being willing to put yourself out there. That takes an incredible amount of strength.
Just when I think no one is listening, someone from New Delhi shows up on my web site…I’m amazed! Across the world someone has taken time to read something I wrote and respond.
What does someone from New Delhi and my web site have to do with being ‘naked in a sauna’. Well, if you think about putting your soul down in black and white (or whatever color you like) it can be a terrifying experience. Like being naked and slipping on a wet floor; too embarrassed to admit your falling!
I know about fear, weakness, laziness and everything that can keep me from getting to be who I want to be…living my purpose! I use to wonder what living my purpose was about; now, of course like many of you, I’ve figured some of it out. After I admit that I’m weak, fearful, lazy and undisciplined: how can I justify not reaching for the resources available? I can’t. I want to be all I can be! I want to make a difference in the world. I want a clean environment; where no species are extinct. I want to feel good about myself. I want so darn much!
By taking that outstretched hand; accepting that I can be more effective if I accept a little help; I can make more of a difference in the world; can feel better about myself; can help to keep more animals safe: be a more responsible citizen of the world!
I believe we are all (animals, nature and humans) interconnected. I believe humans have a huge responsibility to the planet. And If we humans are not fully living our purpose and taking on this serious responsibility, we do an injustice to the life around us!
Thank you for your encouragement!
Peace
I work together with some very talented people in transformation at many levels.
One of the biggest lessons now is that whatever my personal “next” (and often, challenging) lesson is, I attract others to me who need the “same” healing – there’s no way I can avoid this, it seems!
There are many teachers within transformation who see the cosmic and earthly parallels – it’s a bit like “what came first, my idea or the cosmic co-creation plan?”
It’s teaching me to let go and receive – that I am worthy to receive, especially help and love and support and, when I’m really “not in my power”, compassion. Quite a lesson – but, the accompanying “add-on” is abundance flowing like it hasn’t for a long time.
Amazing, isn’t it, how everything’s connected?!!!!
John O
Gail, share some of what you found out about your purpose, I’m so curious…
John, Isn’t that true? I think whenever we are going through something ourselves, the mirror comes. Everything is connected. We are connected!
Selfish vs selfless.. Whenever I’ve come to a point when I question the direction(purpose) of my marriage my father-in-law calls. We share more than a family tie bond..We are both in the same lesson it seems when it comes to the women in our lives we have committed to. Both (mother and daughter) represent difficult lessons for the both of us. Both are very similar in that they have chosen to be “unaccessable” to their men – seeing us as only a means for materialism, occasional sex, and other “functional” needs they may have. For years(he far more than I) we have gone along with their idealogies, accepting this role as our lot in life. I had accepted this as so for many years (and yes, I have had many discussions with my wife so my perceptions aren’t just based on conjecture) as has he. The difference now is that he has accepted this role as necessary-that it would be selfish of him to think of himself-his needs. I on the other hand have come to a different understanding.. Relationships, intimate and otherwise, need to be harmonious and nourishing on many levels at this point in my life…When does one look in the mirror and say “I have done my best and that’s good enough” rather than wallow in the guilt and insecurity of even entertaining seperating from a significant other? My father in law openly shares that change is difficult. The fear of the unknown gets the best of him (us) and he justifies staying in a marriage that has no substanance(Love, compassion, affection,friendship, etc) by convincing himself it would be selfish on his part to place his needs first.. In the past I have accepted his reasoning as my own, but I also feel this reasoning has been detrimental.. Selfish? Selfless?
I share this because men usually don’t/can’t be open and share like this. It’s usually the women who are more adept at opening themselves up and sharing so privately and intimately. But I feel the roles are changing! Men and women need to break out of limiting belief systems that do not serve their Highest Good. “The Mirrors” show us what is acceptable as well as what isn’t. The greatest of relationships I feel are those that are mutually beneficial on many levels. You feel welcome, accepted, appreciated just as you are. Your thankful for being blessed with such relationships and find yourself wanting and deserving more of them. Is that selfish? I say no! My father in law chooses to reason otherwise so as to not have to make changes to his life..It’s what he knows and has accepted as truth…Not right or wrong I guess, just two men sharing similar paths but accepting different perspectives….
Till next time. In Love and Light, Gary
Gary, I get what you are saying, but how specifically does what you say connect with this particular post? Help me be clear…
There has been many who have and continue to offer me a hand with the difficult decisions tha lie before me..And like the woman who refused help in the shower beuase she was too proud, I guess I have been that way as well…
C’mon CK, that wasn’t apparent? Just kiddin! I know this was tough to correlate..