The Shadow is the LOVE of my work.
I’m going to be talking about the shadow a lot! I promise you won’t get bored, because once you start digging and unveiling, you will be amazed at what you find. All your dark secrets; all the things you don’t want to be, and how they slap you in the face when you’re not paying attention. And all your light; all the things you don’t think you could ever be no matter how hard you tried.
Everything you hate about other people and all the wonderful qualities that you admire in other people are really your qualities. That’s right! When you are disgusted by the behavior of someone else, look in the mirror. When you have your mouth hanging open in awe of someone you admire, look in the mirror!
Here’s how it works:
If you are affected by a behavior then you are projecting that behavior onto other people–the quality is really a projection of what’s inside of you. It’s inside of you whether they are good or bad qualities. When you push away a quality because you don’t like the quality or because you don’t think you could be that brilliant thing you see in someone else, then it limits your expression in the world and prevents you from sharing all of who you are.
What does your shadow have to do with Life Purpose?
Qualities such as greed and anger, generosity and compassion are possessed by all humans. We have labeled some qualities good and others bad. The bad qualities are our dark shadows and the good qualities are our light shadows. It is equally difficult for us to embrace our dark qualities as it is our light.
When attempting to share our spiritual gifts with the world, we might come up against our dark and our light shadows. I’ve come up against both in my efforts. I’ve had to embrace insignificant and significant.
For a long time I didn’t want to feel insignificant so I made a lot of choices that left me feeling needed by others. When I felt that others needed me, I didn’t have to deal with the dark shadow part of me that feels disposable. In embracing my smallness and insignificance, I was able to access the part of me that significantly impacts the world in a positive way making a difference in the lives of thousands of people. (I’m ready to step into millions, and I know another layer of shadow to deal with.)
In embracing my significance I’m able to make choices based on the highest good of all and not out of a neediness inside of me; I can use my voice more powerfully and share my gifts without an attachment to how I’m received. By integrating my light and dark shadows I have a wider range of my human and Divine nature, I’m able to share a higher expression of who I am, and I can lead authentically.
Basically, it will be easier for you to live your Divine Purpose if you have access to ALL the qualities and learn how to use them productively instead of destructively. Any work you do around The Shadow will empower you to live your life purpose more fully. You will find that as you integrate both the light and the dark you will have a feeling of wholeness and your experience with the world will shift.
The Shadow–a movie!
My teacher and friend, Debbie Ford, just finished her movie The Shadow. I was invited for a sneak peak in San Diego last month and was blown away. This movie addresses the competing influences of our shadows–both the light and the dark and is sure to open up a long overdue conversation. As this dialogue grows in intensity, I’ll be sure to include you in it.
It is my intention that the insights this movie provides will benefit you personally by empowering you to embrace each of your qualities thereby allowing you to live your most purposeful life!
How you can engage in The Shadow dialogue:
I would love to share in this conversation with you; I’d love to know what you think about The Shadow. Have you read Jung? Have you taken classes? Workshops? Have you attended a Shadow Process yet? What qualities do you hate? Which do you love?
Today, I’m not so hot on the quality “controlling” and I’m jazzed about the quality “ambitious.” Controlling makes me run away and hide. I can hear myself walk into the trap of “I’m not that!” When I think of the ambition required to open up a dialogue around The Shadow in the way Debbie is doing it, all I think of is “AMBITIOUS!” Ambitious leaves me feeling excited at the possibility of our own project involving some movie cameras! I’ll need to move through the quality of “scaredy cat” before I even talk about it! I can feel how much ambition I’ll need to embrace to bite off my next highest expression!
Hey, follow me @shadowtalks and let’s talk shadow!
Learn about the shadow to prepare for our conversations, by purchasing Debbie’s book.
Written by CK Reyes - Life Coach, Facilitator and Cheerleader of your Wildest Dreams! Contact Leila using the tab above.
Divine Purpose Unleashed, Live Your Life Purpose is a division of Divine Purpose Unleashed, LLC. co founded by Michelle Vandepas and CK Reyes. Divine Purpose Unleashed works with Professionals, Therapists Coaches and other service professionals to Unveil their Divine Life Purpose, Unleash their Contribution to the world and Manifest their Conscious Livelihood®. No matter where you are in your journey, the DPU staff of coaches and professionals will guide you to live your purpose with clarity and align your your authentic expression with your marketing efforts. For more information about how you can work with us, please click on the 
Conscious Livelihood
Facebook Fan Page
@DivinePurposeMV
MichelleVandepas
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Hi CK -
This is big food for thought!
“Everything you hate about other people and all the wonderful qualities that you admire in other people are really your qualities. That’s right! When you are disgusted by the behavior of someone else, look in the mirror. When you have your mouth hanging open in awe of someone you admire, look in the mirror! ”
IMPORTANT WORDS
Corinne, This is called “projection.” We are projecting onto others when we see a quality that we think we don’t have or couldn’t possibly have. If you hear yourself saying, “I’m NOT that!” Then you might want to take a second look.
Recently I had to look at the quality of “disloyal.” I could see myself screaming in pain, “I’m NOT that!” I’m the most loyal person you will ever meet. Then comes the digging to find how this quality is expressed through my behavior. I found it and didn’t like it.
I write a weekly column, and I use stories about my daughter. My daughter hates it. I just shrug it off and say, “They’re my stories. hmmpf!” I had to embrace being disloyal to my daughter by writing about her in a public venue.
Now, don’t get me wrong, because I might continue to write about her. But, at least I can do it embracing that when do I write about her, I’m disloyal to her.
I could stand to embrace another quality: entitlement! Yuck!
(See how that works?)
Projections are so subtle—and a self-aware person can sense them…anytime you have a charge one way or another, give you the clue where to look. I think one of the biggest shadows that people have around life purpose is fearing their absolute brilliance and magnificence—we are more afraid of our Light than our dark, just as Marianne Williamson says.
Working with people like us can help so very much so thanks for all you do to help people see themselves clearly–
twitter.com/brightmichelle
Marianne Williamson said it best didn’t she? I projected my light qualities much more than my dark–and I didn’t even know it. (I still do–heehee) I think because projections can be slippery for most, we need to raise our awareness. You hit it when you said the clue to projections lie in if you are affected by a behavior in someone else. Thanks Michelle!